I've blogged about infertility themes on Grey's Anatomy before, in fact, I started watching the show again earlier this year (all 8 seasons, from beginning to end) just because I heard they were struggling with infertility. I also learned about Derek's ex wife, Addison's infertility troubles on Private Practice at around the same time.
I loved the adoption episode, when Meredith says that they tell you when you're going through the adoption process that, "The baby you have is the baby you were destined to have. It was meant to be."
To learn more about what Meredith & Derek's infertility diagnosis is, follow this link: http://www.wetpaint.com/greys-anatomy/articles/behind-the-medical-jargon-what-is-a-hostile-uterus.
Anyway, if I'm being honest, I have to admit that the recent turn of events, in which Meredith tells Derek she's 3 weeks pregnant really disappointed me. I should be happy for her. I should be rooting for a formal infertile sister who finally gets what we all want so badly. But I can't.
I can't because it's not real anyway. She is a fictitious character. Although it comforted me that in her storyline the writers had her sharing similar experiences as me, and brought awareness to the struggle so many of us face, I feel that having her just get miraculously pregnant without going round after round of ART just isn't fair.
It's like they are just validating the bane of every infertile woman's existence, the comment,"if you just relax and stop trying so hard, it will just happen."
In fact, I'm so mad about this, I can barely get into it.
I see in the most recent episode Meredith needs to schedule her 8 week ultrasound. I know how horrible this sounds, but I was hoping they'd have her miscarry again, but it's starting to look like they might go through with this and give them a baby. If she miscarried again though, it would bring more awareness to what so many women go through in their quest to become mothers. Getting our hopes built up so high just to have them all dashed without a moment's notice.
Yes, Mer miscarried once, but it was before she was even trying. Then she tried for a few months, and they gave up and adopted Zola. Now, they are magically back together, their house (which took them 8 seasons to slowly build and they got nowhere with it), is all the sudden finished and they are living in it with their happy little baby Zola. And now they are surprised with an unexpected pregnancy.
This is not real. And it's not fair to all of us who are not going to get this fairytale ending. Have them go through a few rounds of IVF. Show the details. Show the heartache. Show what it does to a relationship. Then let something happen whatever way you want it to, writers! But don't give this to them so easily. It's a disservice to the beautiful work you started out to do in highlighting this plight that effects so many.
The previews for the winter-season finale lef us with a bit of a cliff-hanger, having Mer express her fear that she'll miscarry again and Derek giving her a concerned look. So we'll see I guess. I know I'll be tuned it to see this thing play out either way.
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